Surgery Vanity and self love

Lots of TMI, trigger and maybe just don’t read if sensitive.

My close peeps know I had surgery on Sat. It was 9 hours and horribly expensive and frankly very painful.

I have conflicting thoughts re my surgery but ultimately I did it for me. I have done something off my bucket list and fulfilled a promise to lonely 13 year old me. If I had anything to say to myself from that time, it is, it gets better and you can manage without the surgery but it was also worth it.

Is currently day 3 of my healing. I am finally able to do something other than doze.
The surgery day was exciting I was not at all frightened. I am sure I should have been but I wasn’t. I think, well, I know Heath was worried enough for both of us. He was super efficient and got me there in time.

The prep was what have I eaten, heart rate and blood pressure… do a sensitivity test (SUPER Painful) and then the surgeon manhandled me to get lines on my skin. He wasn’t in anyway gentle. My poor belly was squished, pulled and grabbed. Ouch . Breasts not treated much better.
At this point I resigned myself to the procedure and burying my irritation I followed direction. This surgeon is brilliant but damn his bed manner needs work. The nurses were brilliant, there was a lovely student nurse who made sure I was ok through out the procedure.
I wasn’t knocked out. I had times where I had to mention that something was painful. The nurses kept me comfortable. Two surgeons and 7 to 8 hours later.. they were sewing me up. This took another hour. I was totally awake and shaking. My left arm had been hyper extended for all this time and I couldn’t move it. When it was moved the pain was excruciating. My elbow was sore days even a few days later.

I was taken to recovery. I had to walk like an old lady. Hunched over. My back was not happy about this new development. The nurses got Heath for me. Jess even came in saying I come bearing gifts. 🙂 He had been waiting in the waiting room for a few hours. AWWW 🙂

He settled me into the car and after getting my drugs, took me home. I spent the evening on the sofa. I headed to bed only to find I was a turtle on my back and had no way of moving. Heath tried to help but even painkillers couldn’t take the edge off the pain. Getting out of bed was a new exercise in torture.

Sunday was spent in a haze of pain and dozing.  Heath spent the day keeping me as comfortable as possible.  Sunday night I stupidly tried to sleep in bed again. Bad bad mistake. I was again unable to move. Sleep was impossible and Heath didn’t get any sleep either. Eventually I was tucked into the armchair to sleep. Here I have stayed for days.

Its day three and with pain killers I can move a little. Would  I do it again? Yes I think so. Would I recomend it to others?? Probably not. It is so painful as your abs are used for every movement in your life.  You can’t roll, sit bend, or even yawn without your abs.
I need the three weeks I have off, I need to rest.

Without Heath and my mother, I would not be coping at all. I need the full time care and if you think you can get away with a part time carer, you are under estimating your lack of movement. I was so excited when I could get up and go to the toilet. Small wins.

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One thought on “Surgery Vanity and self love

  1. I can’t believe you were awake for that! You are amazing! you always were, but hopefully you will be a happier even more amazing person now you’ve done this for yourself. You brave girl! xx

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